5 Reasons You’re Lagging Behind Your Peers

Whether you want it or not, there will always be someone better than you. They taught us to be competitive in school, but things are more complex and rigorous once you’re out of those four corners.

Adulting, in general, is a tedious process. Your peers probably feel the same way. But with the rise of social media and unrealistic expectations set on our generation to achieve everything at a certain age, it’s easy to compare yourself to who others deem to be “successful.”

Everyone’s journey is different, that’s for sure. But something about your current situation must make you feel the way you do right now. Here are reasons you feel lagging behind your peers:

1. You wish you were someone else 

One of the main reasons you feel like you’re years behind your peers is because of unnecessary comparison, which in return pushes you to set nonviable expectations towards yourself. So, it’s paramount to keep in mind that we all have different paths, and the pace varies for everyone.

Have you ever thought that maybe you’re not really behind, and you’re just too brainwashed to believe so because of how people portray their lives online? Of course, you may be envious or inspired to beat yourself up harder once you see one of your peers living their best lives on the internet. But little did we know that they may feel the same way as we do-- unaccomplished and dawdling.

The key is to divert your attention and gradually change your mindset. Instead of saying, “I’m way too behind,” tell yourself that, “I’m doing the best I could and I’m taking my own pace. I’m not lagging; it’s just that my journey is different from theirs.”

Instead of wasting your time comparing yourself to others, focus your energy and attention on what matters: achieving your goals and working hard to be the person you want to be.

2. You’re setting unrealistic timelines and goals

“I should already be settled by the age of 25.” “I should have three successful businesses before I turn 30.”

It’s not wrong to set goals and create a timeline for them, but it starts to spiral down when you depend on your worth and success on them and consider yourself a failure when things don’t go the way you planned.

The reason unrealistic goals delay your progress, hence the feeling of failure when you can’t accomplish them on a set timeline, is that instead of focusing your energy on bettering yourself and doing more productive things that you genuinely enjoy, you’re forced to endure activities that do not spark joy. Worst, you dwell on these mistakes, hindering you from taking actionable steps to move forward.

Here’s a tip: Set smart and attainable goals and create a Plan B, C, or, D, so you have a backup if things don’t go as planned.

3. You spend too much time goal-setting, but not acting on them

Here’s what the dilemma is: for people who constantly overthink, it’s hard not to over-plan or over-stimulate your thoughts. But some of us romanticize life too much that we forget that there’s more to it than daydreaming and planning-- and that is the will to act.

The reason you’re lagging behind your peers is that you’re too caught up with the plans you set but forget the most vital step, which is taking the initiative to act on your goals. 

When you’re in your 20s, you’re waiting for your life to “start,” but don’t realize that in retrospect, the perfect time to start is now.

While others are busy pursuing their dreams, you’re busy listing the what-could-have-been. Time to turn things the other way around and keep up with yourself by starting what you have constantly been pushing aside, NOW! Be more practical and let life lead you to where you’re supposed to be.

4. You’re afraid of change

Say you’re the type to commit long-term to something once you get a grip of it. Now, you’re too comfortable and you don’t have room for change. This becomes a problem when you don’t realize your potential because you believe that you’re already good where you are.

Best believe that when you feel stuck, there’s always something you can do. Either you’re just too afraid of change, or you genuinely don’t think it’s the best time to take action.

The choice is yours to make.

5. You’re holding yourself back 

There are many wasted opportunities because someone’s too unsure of themselves or they’re too afraid to take risks. Take the topic of independence as an example.

In our 20s, we’re expected to figure things out by ourselves. We meet people, our priorities change, and so do our beliefs and view of the world. But these beliefs or norms are sometimes the same reason we’re holding ourselves back from doing what we believe is best for us. 

For instance, you want to be independent of your parents and live outside your family home, but you live in a traditional Filipino household that values close family ties and connections. While it’s not wrong to respect these norms and follow your elders, it also won’t hurt to venture into independence and do things your way, especially if you’re already at the right age and you’re financially, emotionally, physically, and mentally prepared to take the next step.

This might be why you feel lagging behind-- the only difference between you and your peers is that they chose to pursue what they want and go with what will help them grow while you are still stuck in your comfort zone.

What can you do to keep up?

First, find a network of people who inspire you. Talk to mentors, build meaningful relationships, and get inspiration from their routine and mindset. Second, reassess your goals and tackle them in a step-by-step and realistic manner. Lastly, and most importantly, don’t be afraid to take calculated risks. Don’t hold yourself back and do what you think is best for you and what your future self will thank you for.

If you’re planning to take the next step by living independently, it’s crucial that your community provides you with the best facilities and environment that allows you to thrive. 

We work best when we’re in a quiet and serene environment with complete amenities that cater to our daily needs. This is what Empire East prioritizes with its first-class developments within Metro Manila. Aside from quality, Empire East also values affordability to accommodate more aspiring homeowners just like you who are just starting out on their independent journey.

the periphery of Pasig and Cainta, Rizal, allowing you to be accessible to the metro’s major hubs and touchpoints. This 22-hectare township development also comes with an 8,000 sq.m. open space called the Highland Park, its very own Highland Mall, the 37-tower Highland Residences, and the member-exclusive sports club called The Chartered Club.

Surely, you can bring out the best in you when you live in a community that has it all.

Aside from this condo for sale in Pasig-Cainta, you can also cop big discounts on Empire East’s newest condo developments in Mandaluyong (The Paddington Place) and San Juan (Mango Tree Residences).

Visit www.empire-east.com/promos to know more about the terms. You may also send an email to inquiry@empire-east.com or call 8810-3333.

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